Wednesday, April 8, 2009
where is love?
life is short. some ppl try so hard to survive and yet some dun treasure it.
some ppl treasure what they have so dearly yet some jus take everything for granted.
im somewhere in the middle i tink. deep down, i treasure everything dearly. im so 幸福 to have my family for being so supportive in watever things i do. even though they nag at times. im probably the kind of 千金小姐 in many ppl's eyes. i seldom do housework, i go to expensive sch, i travel quite alot, etc. i dun really like wat ppl see me as cos i tink 千金小姐 is like kinda useless - in a way. im probably lucky im born in my family. who sld i thank? god/jesus ma? no! they got 100% nth to do with where im born in/at. i thank no one but my parents who create the very good environment for their children to grow in.
(although sometimes i find it not warm enough. maybe im asking for too much.)i dunno y i am tokking abt all these. i suddenly miss my parents even though we are jus under the same roof at the moment. i wan to tell them i
LOVE them alot. but its not the 'culture' that we tell one another this kinda things.
and i tink i miss loving. and how long have i stop loving a guy? seems v long.
i've probably seen/heard abt too many 'bad' guys. alrite, i understand that no one is perfect. neither am i, so i cant ask too much rite? but i cant possibly love someone whom i noe is really v bad rite. anyway i dun love any guy rite now la.
no guys i've been with is really that bad. but they arent any good either. at the point when we r in a rs, we onli see the good in one another. its until u split up and see many better ones, u realise u r stupid to be stucked with the previous one for that period. but those can be part of the growing up experiences.
hai. i dunno wat im trying to say either.
but the point is i dun see any good guys currently. many guys are jus into getting physical with gals whom they are not even in a rs with. some of these guys are single, some attached with gf, some even married. some end up breaking up with gf, some even leave their wives and children. so sad. however, we cant totally blame guys on all these la. some gals are the 'causes' of the whole thing. if gals dun allow any of the not-so-good activities to happen, it wont have taken place at all mah.
some ppl even say due its religion beliefs. becos some religion doesnt discourage premarital sex, it doesnt mean its no good okay.. some religion strongly disagree premarital sex, but who cares rite? its v contradicting cos these ppl say they respect and listen to their god, but den.. they cldnt resist the urge lo. i noe of a 'fren' and his gf
(i dunno his gf) who are the religious type. his gf didnt wan premarital sex, so the guy had sex with other gals 'secretly' lo. anyway this para is the religious part that i do not like to touch on.
i tink i noe more than 50 guys who arent faithful to their gf/wives de lo.. or some who are single, having many flings. makes me scared of noeing anymore guys. esp this kind. see la.. how to find a good guy lik tat? aiyo..
i wish im blinded by all these ugly faces. the more i noe, the more i fear and wan to avoid. when u r blinded, u will be more daring to love again.
p/s: im still straight. hahaha.
p/p/s: as im typing this entry, someone im once crazy for called. we chatted for quite awhile. a happy chat. :) im v happy.
9:52 PM
